The rest of this post assumes that you've read the book, so here's one final SPOILER WARNING.
First of all, I love the worldbuilding. For now, the Incatena Universe might well be my favourite SF Universe, and the Dzebyet in particular are my favourite alien species. Not many people have come up with a half-way plausible interstellar exploration and politics setting that respects the c speed limit, and among the people who have, zompist is, I think, the only one I've read so far.
Problem is, the plot is less good. During Part 1, when things seemed to be going well for Morgan, I had the impression that the Okurinese Regime was run by idiots, and then, when things turned badly for Morgan, I got the impression that Morgan had been the idiot all along. IMO, the main problem during that part of the book is the presence of Pasty and Nasty. Once they were introduced, there were basically two ways the plot could develop:
1) Morgan accepted their presence and would never be able to do much of consequence, or
2) Morgan got rid of them and triggered an instant planet-wide personhunt for Morgan, forcing Morgan to live underground, which would also have seriously limited Morgan's freedom of action and ability to get stuff done.
But instead, we got Option
3) Morgan got rid of the two and somehow, in some way, this did not lead to an instant planet-wide personhunt for Morgan - which was never explained.
And aside from these plot problems, I've also got the impression that some parts of the plot subtly contradict the basic rules of the scenario. To quote from the Boss's speech (online text adventure version):
But, for one thing, the role of the Incatena cruisers in orbit around Okura seems to indicate that a few well-armed spaceships can still cause a lot of trouble for the locals in a distant stellar system. And the Dzebyet's technological edge seems to mean that Orindzai could cause Okura a lot of trouble - potentially even more than actually happens in the book - despite zompist's assertion that "Interplanetary war is only slightly less stupid than interstellar".”Everybody benefits if we accept a few simple rules.
“For instance— no war. There’s no such thing as interstellar empires— Einstein takes care of that. Bottom line, an interstellar fleet is no match for a whole system, with the manufacturing capacity of a planet or two, that’s right there. While, if your invasion fleet gets in trouble, you don’t even know it till years afterward. Or if you send enough of your fleet to guarantee victory— people, metal, expensive weapons— you’re going to bankrupt your own ecology.
”And as a corollary, you can’t build an advantage any other way, because you can’t back it up with force. You try your textbook economic imperialism on somebody, and the natives are going to get sick of it and line you up against a wall.
As for "textbook economic imperialism", Ormant seems to get pretty close to succeeding with it, because most of "the natives" on the planet he's targeting follow the one or other version of an ideology that sees his opponents, rather than him, as the main villains.
So, here are my questions:
1) Given that Jidori sees right through Morgan's "Indonesian" cover by observing that Morgan is clearly used to a lower gravity than that of Earth, couldn't the handlers in the Incatena Spire have foreseen that and come up with a more gravity-appropriate cover?
2) What would happen if the Dzebyet of Orindzai, with all their superior technology, would decide to wage a full-fledged war against Okura?
3) What, exactly, was the Peace Party thinking when they sent Morgan to New Bharat? What were they trying to accomplish? Didn't they think of the risks for their side? The book says that the people in the Freedom movement didn't know who Morgan was because, conveniently, that part of the transmission got lost - but couldn't the Peace Party have sent a human escort who could have explained everything?
4) How do you square Ormant's ability to completely control his owm company - I'm not even talking about the NBCC here - with the scenario's general assertion that the "cult of the CEO" has been dead for thousands of years?
5) How would things look like in the dystopian alternate timeline where Morgan failed, Kumari kept ruling Okura, Ormant took over New Bharat, and the two of them together seceded from the Incatena?
That's all I can think of for now.