Anxiety and the ZBB

[alice]

After my recent experience with an extremely unpleasant anxiety attack, I was wondering if this is something similarly-afflicted ZBB-ers might be willing to chat about or otherwise discuss in a non-judgemental way. I won't be offended if you don't think it's a good idea, it's just that sometimes it helps to talk.

[Torco]

I'm down

I've had plenty of anxiety attacks, but they started relatively recently: I was mostly without mental health problems during my youth, and it wasn't until the pandemic which for me was itself a nice thing, I didn't mind being confined, loved working from home and regularly broke the rules anyway, but co-incided with a bunch of bullshit involving my family and work life.

What really struck me about the first time I had an anxiety attack (or perhaps panic attack, I wouldn't know how to tell them apart) was that I totally knew I was in no direct danger, but my emotions acted as if I was anyway. I was terrified, absolutely terrified, of... nothing in particular. I could feel my mind grasping at thing to be terrified about, as if it was saying "we're scared, what are we scared about? I think we're scared about 'rona. yes, it's 'rona". It was a humbling experience, intellectualy, besides being a terrible, terrible afternoon. I eventually got trough it by just playing an extremely simple piano riff, maybe seven notes plus two chords, over and over again, paying attention to the various details of the playing. I think I understand better now why people paint mandalas or knit.

Thankfully, they've since mostly stopped.

[hwhatting]

I don't suffer from them myself, but I have people in my life who do. What I learnt is that there is nothing that I can do to make the attacks go away, but it helps those people when I'm simply there and distract them by drawing them into conversations about something completely different.

[alice]

What really struck me about the first time I had an anxiety attack (or perhaps panic attack, I wouldn't know how to tell them apart) was that I totally knew I was in no direct danger, but my emotions acted as if I was anyway. I was terrified, absolutely terrified, of... nothing in particular. I could feel my mind grasping at thing to be terrified about, as if it was saying "we're scared, what are we scared about? I think we're scared about 'rona. yes, it's 'rona". It was a humbling experience, intellectualy, besides being a terrible, terrible afternoon.

Oh Deity, this is so familiar: "what the hell is happening, and why?", and your brain fighting your body.

From what I've read, panic attacks come quickly, are intense, and go away after about half an hour, whereas anxiety attacks build up more slowly and last for much longer. There's more to it than that, but it seems to be a reasonable rule of thumb.

Thankfully, they've since mostly stopped.

I'm very happy to hear that; I wouldn't wish them on anyone.

[alice]

I don't suffer from them myself, but I have people in my life who do. What I learnt is that there is nothing that I can do to make the attacks go away, but it helps those people when I'm simply there and distract them by drawing them into conversations about something completely different.

In my experience this is the best thing you can do, as long as you're sympathetic and non-judgemental. It may not work in extreme cases, but then little short of a hefty bang on the head would make any difference anyway.

[Raphael]

Best wishes to alice and Torco!

Thankfully I don't think I've ever had a full-on panic attack, except perhaps for one or two times when my fear of heights got triggered. From my experience with bouts of depression, which may or may not be related to anxiety, I'd say they sometimes got less bad when I really immersed myself in something specific I was doing, as long as it was something I'm principally able to do. Perhaps related to what Torco said about the piano.

The title of this thread, however, reminded me of that one time...
(Somewhat, but not all that, anxiety-related personal experience behind the fold.)

More: show

In each one of my last two years in school, I was in a school play. Then, in the year after I had graduated from school, I went to see the school play put on by the class that graduated after mine, because some friends and acquaintances of mine were in it. I got a chair right in the first row, extremely close to the stage. Then the play was about to start, the lights dimmed and the music started playing, and, well, suddenly I only knew that I was in the hall where I had done my school performances, and everything was set for the start of a play, and, well, I got an enormous bout of stage fright, although I was, you know, in the audience.

That convinced me that this Pavlov fellow was clearly on to something.

[Torco]

From what I've read, panic attacks come quickly, are intense, and go away after about half an hour, whereas anxiety attacks build up more slowly and last for much longer. There's more to it than that, but it seems to be a reasonable rule of thumb.

Oh... then those were definitely anxiety attacks. took me like three hours to come down. it was like eating a really bad magic brownie.

I'd say they sometimes got less bad when I really immersed myself in something specific I was doing, as long as it was something I'm principally able to do. Perhaps related to what torco said about the piano.

Absolutely. I wouldn't think trying to learn something new would have been very effective. also caught that edit hehehe

[malloc]

Given the circumstances facing the world over the few years, from Trump onward, I've been anxious almost nonstop for a while now. Pretty much everything I am reading, from the far right swing of numerous US states to AI rapidly overtaking human capabilities, has me terrified about the future. It seems impossible for me to see how we avoid either some form of fascist dictatorship, mass extinction from global warming, and/or AI taking over the world.

[hwhatting]

From what I've read, panic attacks come quickly, are intense, and go away after about half an hour, whereas anxiety attacks build up more slowly and last for much longer. There's more to it than that, but it seems to be a reasonable rule of thumb.

Oh, in that case the people I mentioned are having panic attacks.

In my experience this is the best thing you can do, as long as you're sympathetic and non-judgemental. It may not work in extreme cases, but then little short of a hefty bang on the head would make any difference anyway.

Thanks for the confirmation. And yes, I've learned by now that telling them that there's no need to panic or to calm down doesn't help at all; what I try to talk about is things I know they're interested in and that puts them in a positive mood, like the latest antics of our cat.

[alice]

Thanks for the confirmation. And yes, I've learned by now that telling them that there's no need to panic or to calm down doesn't help at all; what I try to talk about is things I know they're interested in and that puts them in a positive mood, like the latest antics of our cat.

That's very true. Similarly, you should never say to someone who is depressed or suicidal that you "know how they feel".

[vegfarandi]

I think I've had three panic attacks in my life. Maybe four, maybe two. I remember two clearly. The most recent one was actually really strange. I was at a bar, probably 2019, watching RuPaul's Drag Race and someone had a fluffy puppy with them. As the show went on, I started to get extremely allergic, to the point where I could barely speak by the end so I told my husband we have to go home. We went to sleep and I started dreaming. In my dream I was chocking and I woke up, I felt like I was choking, I started hyperventilating and thought I was having anaphylaxis. I was so freaked out I called 911 and within a couple of minutes, EMTs were there checking me out. Turns out nothing was wrong, and my dreaming subconscious had somehow wound myself up about the allergic reaction I was having. Turns out you cannot have anaphylaxis from dog allergies. Thankfully, the EMTs decided to not log the call as anything and I didn't even have to pay a copay. Mostly I just felt embarrassed.

[chris_notts]

After something happened when I was 16 that I don't really want to get into, I had a bit of a mental discontinuity and developed an issue with anxiety that I didn't really fully "solve" until maybe 30, although it very gradually got less intense over time. I had some panic or anxiety attacks of the being crushed, feeling weak, world/sight turning red type, but it also just reset my general anxiety to a really high level. I never really had any proper help or medications or anything besides alcohol (not recommended)... I briefly tried the counsellors at university but found them to be mostly useless. They did give me some pamphlets though.

The main coping mechanisms were distraction via special interest, reading, other ways to be in the zone and fill my mind with other things, and mantras. I had standard mantras I'd recite to myself, reassuring myself about some of the more common worries, many of which weren't really based on any specific problem, e.g. there was a long section dedicated to various health problems and reassurance that I didn't have them. Sometimes other repetitive behaviours too, more so than before the event.

I don't know that I can recommend a fix because I think the only thing that helped me stop was the original hurt become so old and things going well enough for long enough that I somehow gradually relaxed. I don't often do the mantras or things like that anymore, although I still do some self-managing. "Just wait 10-15 years" is probably not helpful advice.