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malloc
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Given recent events, I have decided to commit suicide in the near future. Regardless of what everyone says about the subject, nobody has provided a compelling reason to continue living. Anyone who thinks the future looks remotely promising is either delusional or fascist (and probably both). For what it's worth, I still have much unfinished business before I end it all and no clear timetable on when I'll be ready.

Nine years I had the opportunity to escape this horrible world when someone mistook my umbrella for a gun and called the cops on me. The cops threatened to shoot me but I convinced them I had an umbrella, not a gun, and they relented. Having seen what the future has in store, I deeply regret not taking that opportunity to escape this horrible world.
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malloc wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 6:19 pm Given recent events, I have decided to commit suicide in the near future.
No. There is still reason to keep living — as Kamala Harris just said, to ‘keep fighting’. There are still things you can do to enjoy life.

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malloc
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bradrn wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 6:57 pmNo. There is still reason to keep living — as Kamala Harris just said, to ‘keep fighting’. There are still things you can do to enjoy life.

Talk to someone: call 988 or visit https://988lifeline.org/
Life will never get better for me. That much is obvious. All the bloggers and pundits I follow agree that liberal democracy is cooked and have no strategy for fighting Trump nor any hope that he can be defeated.
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malloc wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 8:04 pm Life will never get better for me. That much is obvious. All the bloggers and pundits I follow agree that liberal democracy is cooked and have no strategy for fighting Trump nor any hope that he can be defeated.
Where are your revolutionary convictions, comrade? Don't you understand yet that pundits are always wrong about everything?

Revolutionaries of the past fought for future generations. Socialism was never for ourselves. Honor the sacrifice of Red Jesus and continue the fight.

If you're too tired to be a revolutionary, I recommend reading the individualist anarchist Max Stirner. He talks about valuing ourselves instead of taking marching orders from the "spooks" in our heads. (He is casually racist though. Nothing atypical for the time.)
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rotting bones wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 10:18 pmWhere are your revolutionary convictions, comrade? Don't you understand yet that pundits are always wrong about everything?
They have largely evaporated to be honest. I have come to suspect that humans as a species are simply too tribalistic and cruel for sustained progress. Tyranny and bigotry may well be our natural state. Perhaps it would be better if AGI came to fruition and replaced us as the dominant form of life. Certainly it's hard to feel bad about humans driving themselves to extinction through global warming. Sorry if that sounds harsh but I cannot overstate how much humanity has disappointed me, not only in America but the world more widely.
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malloc wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 11:10 pm They have largely evaporated to be honest. I have come to suspect that humans as a species are simply too tribalistic and cruel for sustained progress. Tyranny and bigotry may well be our natural state. Perhaps it would be better if AGI came to fruition and replaced us as the dominant form of life. Certainly it's hard to feel bad about humans driving themselves to extinction through global warming.
The struggle was much harder in the past. The Soviet Union only collapsed 30 years ago. We can learn lessons from our failures and do better next time.

No species changes its essential character in 30 years. It will work if we build up progressive institutions again.
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rotting bones wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 11:17 pmThe struggle was much harder in the past. The Soviet Union only collapsed 30 years ago. We can learn lessons from our failures and do better next time.

No species changes its essential character in 30 years. It will work if we build up progressive institutions again.
Fair enough. What is your theory or explanation for the sudden rise of far right politics in recent times?
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malloc wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 11:28 pm Fair enough. What is your theory or explanation for the sudden rise of far right politics in recent times?
We're living in a period of reaction after the collapse of the Soviet experiment. There was a similar time after the failure of the French Revolution. Back then, all the intellectuals were supporting monarchism. This time, they're supporting capitalism.
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rotting bones wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 11:38 pmWe're living in a period of reaction after the collapse of the Soviet experiment. There was a similar time after the failure of the French Revolution. Back then, all the intellectuals were supporting monarchism. This time, they're supporting capitalism.
How do we break out of the period of reaction, though?
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malloc wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 11:48 pm How do we break out of the period of reaction, though?
It didn't stop the revolutionaries the last time. Organize, educate, give mutual aid and wait for an opportunity.

Remember, no matter what the talking heads say, capitalism is not actually good. It will keep failing, and when people are finally frustrated, we will be ready to offer the humane alternative.
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rotting bones wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 11:54 pmRemember, no matter what the talking heads say, capitalism is not actually good. It will keep failing, and when people are finally frustrated, we will be ready to offer the humane alternative.
Yet it seems like the reactionaries have perfected propaganda to the point where they can always convince people to blame something other than capitalism. Even when crises occur, they can simply flood the public consciousness with misinformation that makes it impossible to identify capitalism as the problem.
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malloc wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 8:04 pm
bradrn wrote: Wed Nov 06, 2024 6:57 pmNo. There is still reason to keep living — as Kamala Harris just said, to ‘keep fighting’. There are still things you can do to enjoy life.

Talk to someone: call 988 or visit https://988lifeline.org/
Life will never get better for me. That much is obvious. All the bloggers and pundits I follow agree that liberal democracy is cooked and have no strategy for fighting Trump nor any hope that he can be defeated.
I can only agree with bradrn's advice. Trump is honestly not worth that.

People are angry and sad right now, that's natural (I am too, and I'm not even American) but this is not over. Liberal democracy is definitely not cooked; I know people say so but that's mostly hyperbole.
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Post by fusijui »

Malloc --

While I'm technically a mental health professional, I'm certainly not your mental health professional. So this is completely generic and inappropriate advice.

You should get off this board. I've seen you here for years and it's always in the midst of a session that, however well-meaning, is feeding your problems and discouraging you from working towards sustainable, healthier, and happier adaptations to your problems. I understand the addictive quality, believe me. So is eating a case of Twinkies for comfort. Weekly. Seriously, this place is not good for you.

Probably reducing time on the internet/social media in general would be helpful. I know how powerful and clingy is the idea that "my social situation is so awful / I am so totally isolated and alone that the internet is my connection to other people and to the world and it sustains me". It's simply not true. Not unless you're physically confined (house-bound and unable to have visitors) or truly in the wilds (offgridding in the desert). Participation in online communities generally leads to those who suffer from depression, social anxiety and social isolation, alienation and anomie, suffering MORE from them. (It's an amplifier, right?) Plenty of evidence accumulating it does no mental health/social adjustment favors to those without those kinds of challenges, either.

Thirdly, and you knew this was coming: hook up with professional helpers as near to you as you can find. Not Skype counselors; someone you can be in the same room with. I'm pretty confident none of them will ever be as smart, cool, and handsome as any of us on this board, but I'm also confident they will actually have a chance at supporting you and helping you.

That is not happening here. I'm sure you understand that too, already, maybe not explictly or in the same terms. People here care about you and want to help, but cannot. This is softly toxic to your health. Please, man, break the habit and reach out for some new solutions.

Wishing you the very best, in any case! Take care.
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malloc, GET PROFESSIONAL HELP. Your life is too valuable to throw it away.
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Sorry but I cannot see any reason to expect things to improve. Trump won the popular vote decisively. His associated movement has not only gained complete control of the government but popular legitimacy. It will not surprise me if popular culture swings hard to the right with minority representation in media evaporating, casual bigotry becoming the norm, and mass conversion to religious fundamentalism. Harris did far worse than even Clinton, who could at least claim the popular vote and thus some degree of legitimacy.
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malloc wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2024 7:15 am Sorry but I cannot see any reason to expect things to improve. Trump won the popular vote decisively. His associated movement has not only gained complete control of the government but popular legitimacy. It will not surprise me if popular culture swings hard to the right with minority representation in media evaporating, casual bigotry becoming the norm, and mass conversion to religious fundamentalism. Harris did far worse than even Clinton, who could at least claim the popular vote and thus some degree of legitimacy.
I am very deeply concerned about these things, too, and think the "doomsday clock" of the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists now needs a second-hand, but yet, I have hope that things will not come out the worst. If I lived in the United States, I'd probably pack up my things now; but Hitler has also been stopped, and it is likely that Trump on one hand, and Putin and Xi on the other, will keep each other in gridlock rather than team up as a "World League of Tyrants". Each of them wants to rule the world alone, and not as a group of three. They have enough conflicting interests in the Near East and in East Asia to keep themselves busy.

I can only repeat what I and others have said here: GET PROFESSIONAL HELP!!! We here can only do so much, and not enough to really help you by ourselves.
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WeepingElf wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2024 9:56 amI am very deeply concerned about these things, too, and think the "doomsday clock" of the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists now needs a second-hand, but yet, I have hope that things will not come out the worst. If I lived in the United States, I'd probably pack up my things now; but Hitler has also been stopped, and it is likely that Trump on one hand, and Putin and Xi on the other, will keep each other in gridlock rather than team up as a "World League of Tyrants". Each of them wants to rule the world alone, and not as a group of three. They have enough conflicting interests in the Near East and in East Asia to keep themselves busy.
You sure about that? From what I understand, Trump and Putin are quite close with Trump routinely accused of following Putin's lead. For that matter, I had the impression that China and Russia work together fairly often.
I can only repeat what I and others have said here: GET PROFESSIONAL HELP!!! We here can only do so much, and not enough to really help you by ourselves.
What exactly would therapy entail and how would it help me deal with the horrors to come, though? Would the therapist really be able to convince me not to feel bad about genocide and tyranny and would becoming numb to such things even be good?

One thing that would help me is having friends in real life. The area where I live is overwhelmingly right wing, thus the appellation "Vendée of America", so finding friends here is rather hard. I honestly have no idea where to start.
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malloc wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2024 8:19 pm
I can only repeat what I and others have said here: GET PROFESSIONAL HELP!!! We here can only do so much, and not enough to really help you by ourselves.
What exactly would therapy entail and how would it help me deal with the horrors to come, though? Would the therapist really be able to convince me not to feel bad about genocide and tyranny and would becoming numb to such things even be good?
Speaking as someone who (reluctantly) started therapy recently:

The greatest benefit of therapy is simply having someone to talk to. Someone who is able to understand your feelings and relate to them. Your therapist would not try to convince you that obviously horrible things are good. (And if they did that they would be a terrible therapist.) But they can help you work out how to understand and manage your own feelings, so that you are able to take action rather than sitting there paralysed by distress.

(Let me add: one place where you won’t get that help is on this forum. We’re all trying our best, but the conversation here just tends to circle around and around without going anywhere in particular. That’s not helpful for you.)
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Post by keenir »

malloc wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2024 8:19 pmYou sure about that? From what I understand, Trump and Putin are quite close with Trump routinely accused of following Putin's lead. For that matter, I had the impression that China and Russia work together fairly often.
even the greatest of enemies can work together when they're forced to.

sooner or later, China (under Xi or under someone else) will not just be threatening places that the US has promised to defend {Japan}, but also places that the US owns...and as we've seen, Trump is many things - territorial being one of them.
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Also consider that Trump is 70 and not actually in the best health. Don't you at least want to outlive him?
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