Venting thread

[Nachtswalbe]

I can’t move out because I’m on work rotation and don’t have the credit to rent an apartment. I will be in campus housing for the spring semester in 3 months, and for the next rotation in an apartment mom will likely recommend

[Linguoboy]

Oh, don't even. To be an Eddythread, there need to be multiple people shouting good advice into a black hole for at least six months.

There's no official criteria but, yeah, the situation was egregious for more like six years before the Boardlord took official action. Having learned from that experience, I don't think we'd wait that long now, but a flurry of short vents is nowhere near sufficient to merit a mod response. If you find them annoying to read, I suggest you simply avoid this thread or foe the poster so that their posts to it are hidden. (That was difficult to do with Eddy due to the sheer number of responses.)

[zompist]

I can’t move out because I’m on work rotation and don’t have the credit to rent an apartment. I will be in campus housing for the spring semester in 3 months, and for the next rotation in an apartment mom will likely recommend

You're in a very difficult situation, but the above is very good news: in just three months you'll be out of the house. You can get there.

You may have another problem though, which you can start working on now. Children of over-controlling parents can end up very other-directed— that is, they rely on the parents to tell them what to do. You need to transition to being self-directed, where you tell yourself what to do, and your parents have not given you the freedom to develop this ability. That's not easy, and you may need help to get there (like a counselor). But that should be the goal.

If you're in classes now, you can use them as an excuse to push back against some of the attempts at control. Like "I can't help you an hour every day with your project, Mom, this class is really difficult and I need to study. I can help you one day a week."

[Nachtswalbe]

You're in a very difficult situation, but the above is very good news: in just three months you'll be out of the house. You can get there.

You may have another problem though, which you can start working on now. Children of over-controlling parents can end up very other-directed— that is, they rely on the parents to tell them what to do. You need to transition to being self-directed, where you tell yourself what to do, and your parents have not given you the freedom to develop this ability. That's not easy, and you may need help to get there (like a counselor). But that should be the goal.

If you're in classes now, you can use them as an excuse to push back against some of the attempts at control. Like "I can't help you an hour every day with your project, Mom, this class is really difficult and I need to study. I can help you one day a week."

I was self motivated enough to do 50 push ups and 3 class online quizzes myself while Mom was talking to someone from church on the phone for about 45 minutes. At least that’s a start

[Nachtswalbe]

I also really have a strong subconscious urge to become a king penguin in mind as well as in body - this stems from a period of my life where I believed awareness=pain, so I used deliberate forgetting to target many center-of-network memories like the word “tedious”. Also both me anf my brother wsnted to actually become Penguins in childhood because they seemed content and non-sentient.

Half of me wants to disintegrate like Ziz, blessed br her name did, Ziz of Sinceriously against CFAR

https://zizians.info/

[Nachtswalbe]

The postrationalists I admire - Rao, Chapmann and Perry are beyond caring about the average person in one way or another - that is, what is is-and they are amoral in outlook

Rao is a management consultsnt who has taught at cornell, lived in Dubai, Singapore, Geneva, LA-backpacked through Colombia (Pablo Neruda’s house) and W Europe, Refactorcamped in Scandinavia and Chile—and he is well meshed with San Franscidco’s circles including Marc Andressen - an epic contrarian who one called the Nietsche of our times

He has defended being friends with Sarah Perry a fotmer Neoreactionary , and backed Scott during NYTGate when Eigen called a former LWer someone a communist woman whom Vassar had used SSC to torment her on

[Nachtswalbe]

I once considered leaving a leaf to go to Refactorcamp in Santiago, Chile

[Raphael]

?????

[Nachtswalbe]

?????

Refactorcamp referred to a series of conferences (what I wanted to go to) hosted by Venkatesh Rao at varying locations, and his now-private Mastodon(Tm) server

Ribbomfarm is Rao’s blog

Nytgate: when a hostile reporter published an Nyt article alleging scott alexander was interested in eugenics and race-science

Postrationalist is a succesor movement to rationalism (e.g lesswrong)

Ziz is an esotericist whose interpretation of the Gervais principles veers into the … weird

[Raphael]

?????

Refactorcamp referred to a series of conferences (what I wanted to go to) hosted by Venkatesh Rao at varying locations, and his now-private Mastodon(Tm) server

Ribbomfarm is Rao’s blog

Nytgate: when a hostile reporter published an Nyt article alleging scott alexander was interested in eugenics and race-science

Postrationalist is a succesor movement to rationalism (e.g lesswrong)

Ziz is an esotericist whose interpretation of the Gervais principles veers into the … weird

OK, but what's all that doing in this thread?

[Nachtswalbe]

?????

Refactorcamp referred to a series of conferences (what I wanted to go to) hosted by Venkatesh Rao at varying locations, and his now-private Mastodon(Tm) server

Ribbomfarm is Rao’s blog

Nytgate: when a hostile reporter published an Nyt article alleging scott alexander was interested in eugenics and race-science

Postrationalist is a succesor movement to rationalism (e.g lesswrong)

Ziz is an esotericist whose interpretation of the Gervais principles veers into the … weird

OK, but what's all that doing in this thread?

I am venting that I cannot disintegrate like Ziz or be amoral like R-P-C

[Nachtswalbe]

That in a way reminds me of my mother, who is an atheist because of Catholicism - in contrast to myself, where I am an atheist solely because I simply cannot have faith, and was never raised to have it.

I may have mentioned this before, but my dad's experiences as a member of the clergy (permanent diaconate) helped make it easier for me to become an atheist. They screwed him over about the same time as I was watching them circle the wagons to protect their own.

I became irreligious because I heard nothing when we were supposed to "listen for god's voice", and because of numerous factual inaccuracies in both the bible and evangelical teachings re: voltaire screaming about hell on his deathbed. exposure to the pagan john michael greer and the amoralist atheist vgr helped a lot

[Nachtswalbe]

I also have to go home to help with research even though my friend is having an event for Anthropology club over at the University.

Also my brother’s sorry butt will be dragged back home on Thursday because it looks like he can’t homework done - both mom and dad agree on this and dad leaves it to mom to do the … review* because he knows he couldn’t handle it

*punctuated with her losing her temper and calling my brother a worthless, useless sh**

[Linguoboy]

The second dose of the shingles vaccine is kicking my ass almost as much as the first dose. I feel like a shit sandwich and wouldn't even be here today if I didn't have a meeting I cannot miss. I was hoping I'd feel better by evening and wouldn't have to cancel my dinner plans, but that's not looking likely.

[Nachtswalbe]

I have to not go to an Anthro club meeting from 8:39-9:30 tonight because mom demands my research again, for a presentation to her boss on X. She promised to pay more than work

[Travis B.]

I have to not go to an Anthro club meeting from 8:39-9:30 tonight because mom demands my research again, for a presentation to her boss on X. She promised to pay more than work

Does your mother not realize that you do actually need free time?

[Nachtswalbe]

I have to not go to an Anthro club meeting from 8:39-9:30 tonight because mom demands my research again, for a presentation to her boss on X. She promised to pay more than work

Does your mother not realize that you do actually need free time?

It's scheduled as follows:
1) rest
2) 30 minutes walking with dad
3) research

[Nachtswalbe]

I never got to stay over college for the weekends - ever

[Ahzoh]

Feeling miserable because yet again I fucked up. This semester I have only one course because I missed the deadline for adding the rest of my courses. Because of financial and mental issues, I haven't handed in any work for the lone course which means that chances are I'm going to fail it if I don't withdraw from it, but I also have to stay in the class because I have no money and no income and the way only to pay my rent and groceries is through the Ontario Student Assistance Program (which I haven't completed because ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ). Also, assume that the aid of family is not an option.

I've dug myself into a hole and I don't think I can get out of it.

[Nachtswalbe]

I wonder what you would make of Scottish nationalism.

Jan Smuts advocated for “Holism”

nations: "the unification of the four provinces in the Union of South Africa, the idea of the British Commonwealth of Nations, and, finally, the great whole resulting from the combination of the peoples of the earth were just a logical progression consistent with his philosophical tenets.