Raphael wrote: ↑Sat Sep 24, 2022 2:09 pm
Part of what frustrates me is that while I think I'm reasonably smart in some ways, I'm not smart in any way that you can actually use for something. I'm no good at higher math. I'm no good at large-scale rote-learning. I'm no good at doing the kind of work you need to do in order to thrive in academic environments. I'm no good at reliably coming up with creative ideas on command. [...]
Most of my career-building skills are tailored for a world that no longer exists. And I'm fortunate that I'm not in a corporate job any more, and can keep ungodly hours, and can retire soon anyway. But it strikes me that you're probably well suited to remote work, and you do have skills that you're not concentrating on. Translation, for instance— you're very good with English. You've probably got some impostor syndrome going on: many jobs don't require previous training at all. QA engineer, for instance: the best QA people I know started out doing something else.
I don't know how it is in Germany, but here there are lots of volunteer opportunities, including desk jobs. It may not sound very attractive to do work and not get paid for it, but most places that use volunteers won't be very picky, you'll pick up skills you can use, and you can get contacts that lead to a real job. (My first job arose out of a volunteer gig.)
From your list it strikes me that the skill you are really lacking, from not ever having a real job, is tolerance for minor tedium. Are you actually "no good" at all these things, or you just don't want to? It's not a moral thing, it's just that jobs and higher education both require that ability to get up on time and do mental tasks even when you don't feel like it. I doubt you have some kind of genetic inability to do those things, you just haven't been in a situation that made you do it long enough that it became a habit.
I wouldn't say any of this if you were happy with your non-working or your hobbies, but you seem dissatisfied. Maybe you could just set your sights on becoming another
Justin Rye, which would not be terrible. (Justin used to plaintively put his CV on his site, but he gave up on that and apparently on employment of any kind.)